Evolutionary psychologist, Doug Lisle, PhD discusses listener questions with host, Nathan Gershfeld. In today's show, we discuss a listener's struggle with being attracted to men her own age, and then Dr. Lisle discusses a question about whether his 10 paid dates strategy is outdated. To listen to past episodes that discuss the "10 paid dates" strategy fully, check out episodes 18, 22, 35, 96, 151, 164, and 284.
1. I’m a 41 year old female. A combination of good genetics, good diet, exercise, good skincare, staying out of the sun have allowed me to look like I’m in my late 20’s even though I am actually 41. I always looked younger than my age and I have what is called a “baby face.” I’m not at all a narcissist, but I would rate myself a 9 even at my age. As a result, I don’t find any of the men my age to be attractive. i have dated men in their 20’s and they were definitely attracted to me, but were turned off when they found out my age, even though I look much younger. My question is, how do I get myself to be attracted to men my age? I find them repulsive.
2. Is the 10 paid dates rule outdated? I spoke to many guys about this and they said that if a girl waited for 10 dates they would assume she is not attracted to them and move on, or that she is just using them to get free meals. They said if they pay they also want something in return. A few have also said that sexual compatibility is a factor in deciding whether they want a relationship with this person, so they wouldn’t enter into a relationship with someone they don’t know they are compatible with. For these reasons do you think that by following the 10 date rule women are missing out on great guys who are misinterpreting their intentions?
Intro 0:00
Dr. Lisle discusses last show 1:00
Question #1 2:47
Dr. Lisle responds 3:33
Dating is like probability of flipping a coin: 23:37
In person meeting is better than photos to judge character 24:41
We can't get someone to change their attraction 30:55
You may be a Rubik's cube 31:33
Question #2 31:53
Dr. Lisle responds 33:04
Wrapping up 51:20
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Intro & outro song: City of Happy Ones • Ferenc Hegedus Licensed for use
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