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It’s not uncommon to experience several different emotions at once during certain situations, and sometimes it can be hard to even pinpoint exactly how you feel. There are also times when certain emotions happen instantly after something occurs, while others take time to set in. These characteristics are what help us identify primary and secondary emotions. Primary emotions are the basic emotions that are hardwired into our brain, which include joy, sadness, fear, anger, interest, surprise, disgust, and shame. These are the feelings that pop up immediately after an event occurs. For example when you finally get the car you’ve always wanted. In the moment, you may feel joy about your brand new purchase, which is completely understandable. Secondary emotions can be more difficult to understand. These are emotional reactions to a primary emotion, and these reactions are learned over time. For example, someone may start to feel guilty about the joy they felt from spending a large amount of money on something they didn’t need. Maybe this was a strong value or message received from family at a very young age. Someone may experience shame for initially getting angry in a situation. Another example may be getting angry because a situation made you sad. When trying to differentiate between primary and secondary emotions, ask yourself if the emotion fits the facts. If yes, there’s a good chance this is the primary emotion. Is it reasonable to be happy about getting a new car? Absolutely. It valid to feel sad because someone said something hurtful to you? Of course. If the facts don’t fit the emotional response, it’s most likely a secondary emotion, and we may need to challenge our thinking around the situation and try to determine the root cause. Emotions can be tough to manage at times, but with practice, we can become more aware and in control of our reactions. For more information, click on the links above. Don’t forget to like us and subscribe.